Saturday, July 16, 2011

Dear Brother

This is a piece I wrote about my brother in law. I miss him a lot.

I always wondered what it was like to have a brother. Then came Steve. He had made his own spot as part of both sides of my families and after a long spell of living together, Steve finally proposed, and I finally had a brother to call my own.

I can still remember seeing him sitting by his sons' pack and play and making his son laugh. I remember him being in the waiting room with Kelly the day that I had my beautiful daughter . I remember the first time Steve held her: he was so nervous! To make him feel better I jokingly told him he could use Lexi to help him get used to dealing with a newborn. He was apprehensive at first but I could tell that he was getting the hang of it quickly, and that one day he would make a wonderful father.

One of my anecdotes is that the similarities between my sister and "Pam" were uncanny. Then my sister got pregnant around the same time "Pam" did, I thought it was very surreal having spent so much time telling family and friends just how much my sister looks and acts like "Pam". So you could say that Steve is a lot like "Jim", the witty, funny, and brilliant co-worker who worked beside "Pam". The two fast friends working beside each other at a much more prestigious company than "Dunder Mifflin" Day in, day out they harvested this relationship which turned into a full-blown romance. Then Steve proposed, and were married in the most perfect and fun wedding I have ever been to in my entire life. Having been the maid of honor, I felt like the evening just flew by the minute I was done my speech to my sister and my new brother that got everyone in the reception hall choked up.

Speaking of toasts, the one Jim gave to everyone at their reception captured Steve and my sister's marriage perfectly when "Jim" says "All this time, I knew I was waiting for my wife."

That one line enraptures how I felt about my sister's marriage perfectly.

I always wondered what it would be like to have a brother. For a short while, God granted me that wish, and I take with me every moment of happiness that ever occurred from or around Steve. I also made sure to make a check off of my Bucket List. Considering the amount of people who probably do not know what a Bucket List is, I can say with no ego how honored and privileged I am to have had my brother Steve as long as I did.

My heart is broken for Steve's mother, family, friends, and my sister, his widow.

There may be a lot of petty drama that happens on both sides of my family, but when push comes to shove, our love for each other is indestructible, voracious, and permanent.

One day, I hope that he is looking down as I tell his son the story of how his Aunt Katie was granted by God to have the best brother in the whole wide world. One day I will have my daughter sitting in my lap, reading this very article back to me.

It's the circle of life, and it can break your heart.

Rest in Peace Steve, I love you.