Monday, October 24, 2011

Mini Me's Birthday

It was the middle of the night and I couldn't sleep because I was getting those fake contractions, I forget the name of them. I figured it was just my body getting used to getting close to the due date, which was April 22nd. However, the contractions started coming closer together and were becoming more painful. I called my doctor and told my symptoms to my doctor's answering service. She said I should wait a few more hours to see whether or not they were the Brakston Hiccups or whatever the heck they're called, fake labor is what I call it.

I waited an hour, probably eating golden delicious apples because my hormones made them taste like apple Jolly Ranchers. Next thing I know, I start loosing my mucus plug (yea it sounds gross as hell I'm not saying it doesn't lol). I got worried because usually after that happens, your water could break soon after.

I went into my parents bedroom at like 3am and said "Mom, Dad, we need to go to the hospital!" They start freaking out and I was rather freaked myself because while I had done a ton of "nesting" the weeks prior to get ready for little Lexi, but I forgot to make up an overnight bag. Luckily my contractions weren't strong enough and I got to the chance to pack up.

My parents took me to Virtua in Mt. Holly NJ, and they admitted me because I was close enough to my due date and it looked like my water would break in a few hours.

They shot me up with Petocin (I don't know how to spell it), which was like a jump start my contractions. I had no idea that the drug they gave me would make my contractions feel as though an alien was going to rip out of my stomach a la Total Recall. Thank the Lord above for epidurals! (To be honest I was scared to death to get an epidural because of the whole "needle in the spine" thing, but at this point in the story I could care less. I'll be a paraplegic for the rest of my life if they do it wrong, gimme!

A few minutes later, sweet relief. I got to talk to my mom and dad, and my sister and her late husband (RIP) came later and hung out at in the waiting room. I had to put her down as one of the people to stay in the room and help out during the delivery. I put my mom down as the other one.

If you're wondering why I blogged under "Trixie McBimbo" for so long on Myspace (and continue to be TrixMcbimbo on Youtube), it's because of a quote said by Lorilai about Rory's arrival: "It was akin to doing the splits on a crate of dynamite." 'Nuff said.

Before I knew it, I was ten centimeters dilated, and even though we all knew it could very well be a fast delivery, my mom and sister were still startled by what the doctor had just said. They stood on either side of me and with the help of a nurse (who refused to listen to me when I kept telling her SHE'S NOT MOVING I FEEL LIKE I'M TRYING TO PUSH A WATERMELON THROUGH A PINHOLE RIGHT NOW BITCH, SHE AIN'T BUDGING!!" ok that last part I made up)

The doc had said to get him if I couldn't give birth in two hours, so two hours of silent pushing (yeah that's right, I barley made a peep the whole time. That's how gangster I am), my mom starts crying hysterically and the next thing I know, Lexi is on my stomach. But she wasn't breathing. I froze, watching her.

Thankfully, she started crying and coughing. The nurse cleaned her up and let me hold her for a few seconds before she had to go to the NicU (she had to stay the night there because she was two weeks premature). I don't remember much while they cleaned me up and moved me to my room where I was to stay for a few days.

Before they wheeled me up, they let me stop by the NicU to see Mini Me some more before I went to my room. She was the most perfect thing I have ever seen in my life.

She continues to be the most perfect thing I have ever seen to this day.

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